Author:  Joe Carnaggio

Gentlemen,
Our annual pilgrimage to O C has passed and once again we were not shortchanged on the laughs and good times.
Here are some of the highlights of our trip:

Mike, Duck and Ben overslept and missed B & B.  Big Black remembered us from last year.  Jim collected gambling debts for the weekend.  Then Dave collected more gambling debts. Someone said there was more money spent on gambling then the cost
of the trip.  After B & B we headed to River Marsh which had the smallest parking lot and most importantly Only 1 toilet.  The line was 9 deep of K-8's wanting to use the facilities. Dave J shows up while we were teeing off on the first tee.  Jeff had trouble getting off the tee. In fact once he didn't make it past the lady's tee. He went up to his ball and proceeded to drop his pants to his knees and hit the ball. It was his best shot of the day!  Some nice scores were posted at River Marsh.

How about WELCOME KRAZY 8's GOLF CLUB on the Big Screen at the Bay Sails Motel!

Everyone's nicknames on the envelopes when they picked up the keys.  The Hospitality room was over the top. There wasn't a better open bar in all of Ocean City that weekend.  Yagerbombs were dropped all night long.  Hey Mike, that's 5 in a row, are you sure you want another?  Even the pilot George, with the group chanting his name, went for a Yagerbomb.  Did anybody drink beer?  After Jim and Roy settled in their room, they had to take an Aveeno bath after searching for Jeff's ball all day in the brush.  Texas Holdum was DOMINATED by Ken. Ken pocketed over $200 with 2 first places, 2 seconds and a third. He displayed his "take no prisoners" approach by machine gunning everyone. "dadadadadadadadadadada"  While playing cards Mongo got behind ICE and slammed his 2 hands with force on Ice's chest. We thought Ice was going to go into cardiac arrest. The whole weekend Ice had bruises of Mongo's hand print on his chest.  Everyone went to Smitty's for dinner and had a great time. Even the waitress remembered Bryan from last
year and delivered him a grill cheese. Scott and Duck took a midnight stroll from Fager's to Secreat's. They were in deep thought about the Mustard.

Friday started with cream chip beef omelette's at the General's.  Baywood Green Golf Course had to be the most picturesque course we evered played. MONEY managed to do a telephonic job interview on the golf course.  Phil went to the Wine Festival. After golf some went to a Mexican restaurant while others wanted to head back to the hospitality room where there never seems to be a dull moment.
The Pork Police were on high patrol all weekend which helped Bryan shoot a pair of 82's.  Bryan was warned to eat nothing but cheese
quessidillias and stay away from pork. More drinking and card playing was done while watching football.  Mongo convincing everyone that if we never ever talk about the Coin's incident, Ed would get his head shaved. Out of 21 guys on this trip, someone brought
shaving shears. Don't quite know why, but Bob "9 inch" Nolls had them. Mongo volunteered to shave Ed's head. Imagine the whole group watching Mongo shave Ed's head in the bathroom. Ice also participated in grooming Ed's goatee. In fact Ed did say he wanted to look like Ice. Mike Fowkles......best K-8 cameraman ever.  George, Mike R and John bantering back and forth with Steve as which arm forces was better, the Air Force or Navy. Finally George looked at Steve a said simply FU.  Some of the group went to Fagers. Anyone witness the girls interested in Ice this year. First the 23 year old one night and then the girl in the white top. A quote from Ice "I still got it!!!"  Somebody in the group did a pole dance. Band was great. Adcocks wanted to kick this one guy's ass at Fagers......what a violent drunk. Ice notice that Jeff seemed a little intimidated by the women. Has it been too long since he mounted anything? Also Ed played COP while trying to break a fight up with these 3 young punks. He flashed his Verizon badge and told them to hit the ground. To Ed's surprise they listened to him. At that point Ed wasn't sure what to do.  Back to the hospitality room and more things took place. There was a new record for F-bombs dropped 74 by Adcocks in 10 minutes.  ICE preceded to tell us about some guy throwing up at
Tubby's. He also said he got into a hugh argument with a Redskin fan there. That's when he had enough while telling this story that he broke his sub in half and threw 1/2 against the wall where it splattered everywhere. Note this was 2:30 in the am.

Saturday, Breakfast again at the General's and more cream chip beef omelettes. Played War Admiral where only the strong could survive. The wind did pick up a bit. Best cart girls around. Ice fell in love with the blonde.  Jim proceeded to drop troul and take a piss in the middle of the fairway. Jeff then yelled put that Shitaki back in your pants. Roy and Joe chose to putt on the fairway as their lay
up shot. Who left Phil all alone at the track?  After golf it was back to the hospitality room.  There was a contest between, Mike, Duck, John and Dennis on who could flick their cigar on the hotel billboard sign. I believe Dennis won. Lance spent all weekend in the hospitality room looking at a Playboy and Maxium magazines. Where was Ben at all weekend? All the fish he caught and he couldn't clean one and cook it for breakfast?  Jim interrogated Ed for 45 minutes and Ed answered every question and ham hocks. Then there was the awarding of the Mustard Jacket to the new Club Champion Scott Hill. While Ken was telling everyone about his experiences with the Mustard this past year, Jim yelled to him "Where did you get those sandals from........... MOSES?"  Joe was sick and missed the Mustard Jacket ceremony.  The new Champ came over to his room and gave Little Joey words of encouragement. He told the ill Little Joey to hang in there that things will get better. The Champ asked what he could do for little Joey and Joey said, Champ please repeat as Mustard Champion.  Next it was back at Fagers for some.  There the Mustard Jacket was wore proudly by Scott. There were many people who came up to him asking about the history of the Mustard. In fact somebody asked for his autograph.  There was this chick with plenty of curves and a nice, nice booty that had Mike's attention. In fact she had plenty of our guys attention.  Jeff had his butt grabbed and they asked if he had underwear on. He said no and preceded to show he was commando. After Fager's some went to Tubby's, some went back to the hospitality room while Phil and Joe were to take the ladies make to their condo. Well as everyone got
in Phil's Xterra there was no room for Joe. Well there was room in the far back. Phil said sorry brother, see you when I get back. Guess Joe got CB'ed. So Joe walked over to Tubby's where Jeff, Mike, Bryan and Scott were ordering. There was 4 ladys in line and Bryan said to them I saw you at Fager's last night and I have your pictures to prove it. They loved the fact he remembered them and took a liking to the Mustard Jacket. One asked about it and the conversation grew to how much they knew about golf. They knew what a birdie, par and bogey were. They didn't know what a divit was. Out of a clear blue sky Mike asks "Do you know what a PLUMPKIN is?" "Did you ever give one?" "Would you ever give one?" All of a sudden this gal's face got blood red and a great conversation got a little testy. Her girlfriends didn't know what it meant and she whispered to them what it was. First of all how in the hell did she know what it meant unless she possibly dabbled in it. She said she knew the meaning from wikapedia. PLEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEASE!
At the hospitality room, Ben walks in from out of nowhere and yells, "Has anyone in this group had a B J in the last 20 minutes"? Wait a minute, who was he rooming with?

Gentlemen all I can say, if you didn't have a good time it was your own fault.  I personally had a blast.  Life is too short. You can't put a price tag on the amount of fun we had. Hope everyone can make it next year.
Bustard Maxwell House